Welcome to Snarkfest

Welcome to my snarky corner of the web. Join me as I discuss everything from wine to chocolate. There may be a few other topics mixed in there too. I talk a bunch about my amazing offspring, 19 and 17. I sometimes go on and on about my secret crush on the amazing Mike Rowe. I talk about things that irritate me or things that make me happy. Sometimes I just talk to hear myself talk. Feedback is always appreciated but please make sure it's respectable. No nudity or profanity. I'm the only one allowed to be profane. But any and all snark is welcome and appreciated!

Monday, April 3, 2017

Kids: They cost. A LOT.....

I had no idea how much these kids would end up costing me when I had them. Sure it was expensive to deliver them by C-section in the hospital. Insurance picked up the tab on that one. Thanks, Aetna! But these kids I have are bleeding me dry, one activity at a time. Allow me to sound like an old fart for a moment. When I was a kid, I was involved in NOTHING. I wasn't musically inclined (my school didn't have a band anyway), I wasn't athletically inclined, I had very few hobbies that required equipment. I read. I rode my bike. I wasn't a clothes horse, and when I turned 13, I started working.

I started as a set-up girl in a restaurant, and when I turned 14, I moved up to waitress. I always worked for my spending money. After my summer as a waitress, the restaurant where I worked burned to the ground (I grew up in Wildwood, the restaurant was on the Boardwalk, we called it Jewish lightning when a Boardwalk block burned down). For the next 4 summers I worked in an arcade on the Boardwalk where I made a little money, and met lots of cute boys. OH the cute boys! But I digress. I had a J O B. I don't ever remember nickel and diming my Mom for stuff.



Fast forward to today. These kids today. Two daughters. Two talented, athletic, musically gifted daughters. Oh my aching wallet.

Let's start with 14. Sax player. Sax lessons. We bought her a sax, reeds, nice neck strap, more reeds. She plays volleyball. She's on a team that travels. That's not cheap. Gas, snacks, dinner after her tournaments, sometimes hotel rooms. She plays basketball. She goes to basketball camp every summer. Thank goodness her grandparents pay for that. She also has ginormous feet. Did I mention those feet don't ever seem to stop growing? You know what's totally not fair? I went shopping for basketball shoes for her last year, and the biggest size I could find in women's was an 11. She needed a women's 11.5. So we had to go up to a men's size. And the men's basketball shoes were, no lie, $60 more expensive than the women's shoes were.

Moving on to 16. Trumpet player, trumpet lessons, sheet music, and now she tells me she needs a Harmon Mute. I don't know what that is but I have no doubt it's going to cost me more than a gallon of milk (or gas). She runs track and plays basketball. Thankfully her feet may have slowed down in the growth department because she has been in the same basketball shoes for 2 seasons (thank you baby Jesus). But she DOES need track spikes.

What?

Track spikes, mom.

Can we get them at the running store in town?

No, mom, not cross country spikes, track spikes are different. We can order them from Dick's.

But I have a gift certificate for the store in town.

I laugh at your gift certificates! BAH!!

Sunday we went shopping for prom gowns. HO-LEEEEE SHIT. Can I just tell you that I think my prom gown for my junior prom may have cost a total of $89? And that was INCLUDING alterations.  The first dress store we went to scared the pee out of me. I didn't see a single prom gown in that store for under $289. And I know that she'd have to have a few alterations done so we were definitely going over $300. Next store we found was a little more reasonably priced but not by much. We STILL ended up going over $300. We said 'yes' to the dress. And my wallet died a little more.

Next year will be 16's senior year and 14's freshman year in high school. And the band is going to Disney. So that'll be two in the band going to Disney. And my wallet will die a little more. Then 16 will be 18 and go away to college. And my savings will die a lot.

At this rate, hubby and I will be working until we turn 128. But our daughters will be well-rounded, responsible, beautiful adults. And hopefully, they will take care of us in our old age. Hopefully they'll wipe our drool, or our butts, and they'll thank us for making them the well-rounded, responsible, beautiful adults that they become. Money is overrated, right? Retirement is going to be boring and who wants to be bored, right?

26 comments:

  1. Criminy. My kids haven't even hit high school, and I feel your pain. It's going to get so much worse for me. And you. We love our kids. We love our kids. We love our kids...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We do love them. Sometimes I wish they were a little less motivated, but I guess it's a case of 'be careful what you wish for'. I also don't want them living in my basement when they're 35.

      Delete
  2. I feel ya. My activities? Yearbook club. Art club. Spanish club. That was HS. Worked too, in a warehouse, to build character. My kids are 11 & 9. "Can we have a party at Skyzone?" Nope, you want to be on gymnastics team, so that's where my $ goes. "So-and-so is going to Disney." Yip, and you have travel baseball, you get to go to all KINDS of places!! Maybe I'm mean, but we have to prioritize, and No is definitely part of my vocabulary. Balance & moderation will yield these well-rounded, responsible adults. I'm very lucky - mine don't ask for much, but we have yet to get into the age of dances, proms, dates, etc. I think I just died a little saying that...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Definitely balance and moderation, and trust me, my kids will tell you, they hear the word NO out of my mouth WAY more than they hear yes.

      Delete
  3. Oh yes...

    Travel for debate club. Driving lessons. AP exams. And now he wants boxing equipment. He's paying for that himself. Lately, it's literally been hundreds of dollars a week. I don't HAVE spare hundreds every week...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What? You don't have a money tree out back? You should get one, they're nice.

      Delete
  4. Though I only have one said kid, i can totally relate. I make up for the second kid via the only kids meds. Just got a bill for her new arthritis meds (infusion 2 weeks apart and then once a month) at a tidy sum of $7330.00 per infusion. I feel your pain.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jeez Jen, you take the prize for mother of the century!!!

      Delete
    2. I am so grateful health care is free here in the UK. I take over 70 bills a day to stay alive and my 9 yo niece has arthritis and has to have all kinds of treatments. So grateful it's all free here. Do you get a discount for her being a child? Does insurance cover it?

      Delete
  5. Whew! I feel exhausted and broke reading this post! :-) What we do for our "well-rounded children."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I needed to lie down after I wrote it!

      Delete
  6. I call Jacob my million dollar child....and he is 10. Don't even get me going on the Jillian's $500 for her gymnastics uniform and travel bag. She's 8...and not in the olympics. Holy crap are they expensive.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm with you, I'm feeling your wallet pain.

      Delete
  7. Oh, yes ... I have the Middle School Track Boosters paper next to me that is requesting $40. And she needs shoes. And I just dropped $80 on a newly strung, gently used tennis racket ... and $50 on a giant tennis bag ... and $50 on specific shorts he needs ... and I gave him $20 for food when they stop to eat on the way home from the match today.

    My kids make me feel like I'm hemorrhaging money!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You feel that way because you ARE hemorrhaging money. One $20 bill at a time (or more!)

      Delete
  8. We've got one in daycare and one in preschool, which is free where we live. Phew. Before the youngest was in daycare, she was with a nanny. Holy smokes, she made more money than I did!
    Now we're getting ready to buy a house so we have more space. And then they'll start really getting into the "extra's". So far sweets has only been signed up for ballet, but I know more is to come....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. More is definitely on the way. Prepare now!!!

      Delete
  9. Almost makes you want to have another one just so you can sell it. Almost.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Oh yes, I agree. It seems as if schools do so much more than they used to. It is expensive even in second grade. I have opted out of the last two end of grade trips because there are charter buses, admission tickets, etc. And easy 200 bucks. Whatever happened to just an end of grade play day at the park!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Everyone that had kids tell me that it's super expensive. I'll live vicariously through you allas I don't have kids.

    My money is spent on dinners, concerts, vacations, weekend getaways, sports tickets, bar nights, etc.

    Sorry, don't hate me! :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Right there with ya! I realized at age 12 there was no way I was having kids, and have never regretted that choice. I do feel sorry for parents today, though, as life is so different than it was for us growing up. Hang in there, moms and dads!

      Delete
  12. I just paid for Miss Gremlin togo to chess Nationals in Dallas in May. But it's subsidised and she is very committed. But you're right, they're expensive little critters.
    Thanks for hooking up to the Hump Day Hook Up

    ReplyDelete
  13. My older son wanted to play sax. So we rented the sax (most expensive band instrument to rent) and then he wouldn't practice. Grrr. Wanted to play drums. Got him drums. Didn't want to practice. Repeat with guitar. Luckily, we use the drums and guitar. Kids are damned expensive and then there's the food they insist we buy, but don't eat. Oy! Oh - and hey, I didn't realize you were a fellow Jersey girl! I'm a nuevo (transplanted) Jersey girl, but still… ;)

    ReplyDelete
  14. My children are not allowed to participate in any activities that require "gear" or "attire." They'll probably be single forever and never leave home, but whatever. I

    ReplyDelete
  15. My girls are 16&13. 16's prom dress and all accessories came to over £500 which works out to about $700. Both are going on a school trip £700 so say $1000 with spending money. Girls go back to school early September here in the UK, so we have stationary shopping to do at least $150 and 16 starts 6th form so needs a new uniform (even though it's the same school!) then in October she starts her driving lessons (about $40 each hour) have to pay for a provisional license first ($150) and that's before Christmas! I think we should emigrate to the US, somewhere there's no big spiders or alligators etc but then knowing my luck Trump would become President and have to move somewhere else!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Hear hear! It is CRAZY how much they cost--just when you think you have it covered, the next expense rolls in! GAH!!

    ReplyDelete

I do read all comments and try to respond to them. Unless you're trying to get me to visit your website: Cheap Louis Vuitton Bags. Then you can go pound sand.